"The work of 167 poems, verses and limericks and such continues the tradition of Dr. Seuss, Raold Dahl and Ogden Nash- humor with bite and a bit of the O. Henry "twist" endings.
There are a few poems of observation, one of which brings tears to my eyes each time I read the book because of the nature of my upbringing.
Funny how poems can do that to you...
Look inside and read a few and, hopefully, you will be tempted to want to read more."
THE ANT (Verse)
The ant is very good at finding
bits and scraps that no one's minding
getting icky sticky toes
on everything to which it goes,
finding holes between the boards
telling friends who come in hoards
to eat and ultimately sack
the spot and carry goodies back.
(In other words, they eat and then
make take-out service to their den).
It's bad- your table filled with ants.
It's worse to have them in your pants.
The very worst is when you got'em
hanging from your sandwich bottom!
Better check or you might eat them.
Ants can cling - you can't excrete them.
THE LION #1 (Verse)
I am very puzzled.
Recently my legs were nuzzled
by a lion in a pride.
When that happens should I hide
or should I just reach down and stop her?
I'm not really sure what's proper.
Tell me what I ought to do.
NUZZLED AT THE CITY ZOO
Amscram, go, vamoose!
Avoid all lions on the loose!
Your choice is either plan to stay
or wet yourself and run away.
The former choice- you might could die...
the latter- in an hour you're dry.
If this is all the choice you get,
then, every time please choose to wet
'cause lions, when they start to chew
leave very little left of you.
LITTLE WILLIE AND THE BOA
Willie didn’t heed the warning,
went and played with snakes one morning.
Will was swallowed by a boa
and is in this world no moa.
LITTLE WILLIE BUNGEE JUMPS
Liitle Willie bungee jumped
from off the Eiffel Tower.
Falling took a second, but,
the cleanup took an hour.
People age and go to pot
and have a face that looks like rot,
accumulating frowns and scowls
and baggy eyes and sagging jowls.
The hair (If there is hair in sight)
gets coarse and wild and turns pure white
and youthful looks all disappear
while parts of face hang down to here.
You stand there thin and frail and bent
and wonder where your youth has went
or wish there really was no need
for human beings to go to seed.
Consider then the choice you've got,
go to seed or go to pot...
It will not help to rant and rave
because your foot is in the grave.
In spite of wrinkles by the faceful,
do your aging, but, be graceful...
"What an amazing collections of poems. I just got the book and started to read it. I'm not much of a reader but I just can't stop reading it. Can't wait to read them all. Great job Mr. Haun!!"
"A fun book. Poor Richards's poetry is very accessible and an easy to read piece of writing.
It'll gives you a smile."
"My 11-year old son and I both loved this book. The author has done a great job of presenting everyday life in a humorous way. My son especially loved the delightful poems about animals and insects. I liked them all, especially the ones on occupations and famous people. There are funny ones, silly ones, sad ones, and thought-provoking ones. A little something for everyone to brighten up your day!"
~Paul M. Volkman
"The diversity of Richard's writings makes it book for everyone. The verses on every type of animal, bug and bird points out his vast knowledge. His use of wit make his observations of People a fun and interesting read. Other writings showed the dept of his soul as they touched mine. I smiled, laughed and 'teared up' as I read through this book. A wonderful collection with something to please every reader."
THE GOLFER (Occupation)
The golfer chips up on the green
and tries to putt for par.
The ball is stroked toward the cup
but doesn’t go that far.
THE HUNTER (Occupation)
I am a mighty hunter.
I bag what laws allow-
Rabbits, deer and pheasants,
and now and then a cow.
Richard Haun served in the U.S. Army in Japan before beginning a career as an educator. He is a multi-talented artist being involved in press photography, ESL English instruction, sculpture, cartooning, street performance, calligraphy, magic, creativity instruction, writing and poetry. He has been in Japan, prior to retirement, as a Department of Defense employee at the U.S. Army Garrison-Japan MWR where his duties included Recreation Center Director, Youth Services director, Child Development Center director, and Marketing Branch chief.